The Untold Truth About Mentors. What makes a good Mentor and what are the criteria for an outstanding mentor.

What is a Mentor?

There is a lot of myth about Mentors. Lots of people think teachers are mentors that are not always the case.

The untold truth about mentors and mentoring. Before you choose a mentor you should understand what qualities your mentor should have.

The truth about Mentors

A Mentor is a person that teaches you the knowledge what you acquire. The definition of a Mentor according to the Cambridge Dictionary is

“A person who gives to another less experienced person help and advice over a period of time.”

In my own words… If you want to go from A to B then you have to look for someone who has already achieved that goal you have set. If you want to make 5 Million a year you will look for someone who makes already 15Million a year.

When is the right time to choose a mentor?

  • When you feel stuck
  • Getting started
  • If you lack inspiration
  • If you are in transition
  • When you want to achieve more
  • When you want to go international with your brand
  • When you want to achieve something great
  • Grow massively
  • Become a Millionaire
  • Need guidance
  • don’t waste time

What are the benefits of choosing a mentor?

  • Saves you time
  • Avoid mistakes & failure
  • You have to step out of your comfort zone
  • Get fresh perspectives
  • Immediate Answers
  • Demonstrates Leadership
  • You have an accountability structure
  • You learn how to train your brain to see opportunities
  • Be aware of self-sabotage
  • You learn to choose your time wisely
  • Design your life instead of living it by default.

Be aware that being mentored by a great mentor will not be cheap unless you can afford it you might have to find someone who is in your league and in the reach of your wallet. ( see it as an investment in yourself, not an expense)

You can talk to people you have met and would be happy to be your mentor. There are people out there who have a lot of knowledge and feel honoured to become a Mentor.

Network Marketing great mentors. 

Gary Vaynerchuck is a great Entrepreneur with lots of experience.

Tony Robbins is a great life coach.

John Assaraf is a great Life Coach. Especially with his course called “winning the game of money. “

The list can go on.

How can you be sure when choosing or looking for a Mentor to chose the right one.

What should you expect when looking for a mentor?

How often should you come together for training, what are your goals?

Do you really want to have a mentor who pushes you and brings out the qualities that you have hidden and not even you know that you have them?

1. Who should your mentors be, and how do you find them?

The untold truth about mentors
Einstein was one of the great Mentor’s who lived on earth.

First, you need to determine your values (they can be aspirational values — values that you are striving to achieve), or they can be values that are clearly part of your life now.

Next, you need to think about your personal and professional goals. Have you noticed that many successful people tell people to set goals? There’s a good reason for it — they work! So think about yours before you look for a mentor.

Once you’ve looked at your values and thought about your goals, then, look for people that you believe embody those values and goals. Try to “network up.”  via 4 Questions to Ask About Networking Mentors

This is a free seminar from John Assaraf. Please feel free to sign up. Click here

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2. Should the relationship be formal or informal?

It is not either/or. It is both/and. Both can work. Having had many, informal mentoring relationships, as well as formal ones. Recommending and creating a formal mentoring relationship for about a year (if the prospective mentor is willing), then let it transition to something more casual overtime. If the mentor is only available informally, go with that. via 4 Questions to Ask About Networking Mentors

You have to think about it, the person must be in harmony with you, and both of you should respect each other. It is no good if after a while you think the mentor is too strict and he thinks you are too lazy or the other way around.

Never forget a mentor will not babysit you, a mentor will mentor you.

Understand that when you choose a mentor.

3. What should you expect from your mentor, and what should they expect from you?

It depends on whether your relationship is formal or informal. In both cases, you want the relationship to be congruent with your values and goals. It always comes down to that. Formal relationships should have structure and processes in place. They should include regular meetings in person or by Skype (generally weekly/monthly). There should be a set objective or topic to discuss at each of these sessions. via 4 Questions to Ask About Networking Mentors

Your goals should be written out and a timeframe should be attached to it. You can send questions and problems you encounter in advance before each meeting so your mentor has time to prepare and the meeting will be efficiently executed.

4. How do you both determine whether the relationship is working and when it’s time to move on?

As long as you continue to receive value from the relationship and/or give value to the relationship — it is working. I have had some mentoring relationships where I started as the mentee, but it evolved over time where I was a peer mentoring my mentor on certain issues. That’s when you know you’ve developed a long-term friendship. Ideally, a strong mentoring relationship evolves into a long-term connection and friendship. via 4 Questions to Ask About Networking Mentors

This is a free seminar from John Assaraf. Please feel free to sign up. Click here

Goal achievement and Time Management

If you tell your friends that you have a mentor you might be surprised to see how many people think it is a waste of money.

Unfortunately, not everyone is open to receive mentoring and pay for it. Most of them do not understand that the mentor is actually spending his time to teach the student.

A good Mentor will go above everything else and will make sure you will excel in perfection.

It is also a good knowledge improvement for a mentor to teach you as over time the mentor will gain more knowledge as things are changing especially know in this networking world.

The digital age is moving so fast, and what was yesterday it might not be in today. Just have a look at Facebook, a couple of years ago all the younger generation was on it now there are only the parents of the younger generation on it. Why?

Simple the younger ones do not want parents to read what they write or chat about.

The Best Mentors Think Like Michelangelo

choose the right mentor

Michelangelo approached the craft of sculpting with the humble conviction that a unique and beautiful piece of art already existed within the stone, and his job was only to release it. We think the best mentors approach their art in the same way.

Social psychologists have already confirmed that in the best romantic relationships, partners sculpt one another in such a manner as to bring each person closer to their ideal self — the person they want to be.

Termed the Michelangelo phenomenon, a skilled and thoughtful relationship partner becomes committed to first understanding and then reinforcing or drawing out another’s the ideal form. But a skilled mentor can also affirm another’s ideal self — that unique, promising, but the vulnerable form that might be hidden from view. via The Best Mentors Think Like Michelangelo

How exactly can a mentor develop a vision the mentee ideal self? Not everyone can become a mentor and it takes skills and natural talent, as well as the heart, has to be in teaching and mentoring.

You must love to share information with others. It becomes like a prayer for a mentor to teach the student and hold for him only the good in hands. The mentor must have lots of passion to invest his time into a student. The Mentor must have a clear vision of where his students will be in 6 months and understand the goals the students have set and are achievable. 

This is a free seminar from John Assaraf. Please feel free to sign up. Click here

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Setting goals are easy to achieve them is another thing. It is no use setting goals when you know there is no way to achieve them. ( read my blog about goal achievement)

Does woman have a harder time to find a mentor than men?

Research on cross-gender mentoring reveals that women face more barriers to finding a mentor and that even when they do, they may reap a narrower range of professional and psychological benefits.

One reason for this may be that when it comes to key interpersonal skills such as listening, men sometimes struggle with the sort of active listening required to help a mentee gradually unearth her ideal self. via The Best Mentors Think Like Michelangelo

How would it work when a woman mentors a man, or a younger men mentors an older man, the same goes for younger woman mentors an older woman. Would there be differences and dislikes during the mentorship? I guess yes, there would be. What do you think?

Would you say that men are more in general task-orientated and woman, in general, are more relationship orientated? Men have a hard time to really listen to the woman they mentor, as the brain of a man and a woman has different wires or functions in a different way.

Brain differences between Genders. Do you ever wonder why woman and men think so differently?

Male brains utilize nearly seven times more grey matter for activity while female brains utilize nearly ten times more white matter. What does this mean? 

The truth about woman and mentors

Great mentors are often given to crafting bold, even audacious pictures of where a mentee can go in their career. For instance, Sandy Stosz, a Coast Guard three-star admiral, recently told us:

[My mentors] gave me opportunities I hadn’t thought about. They gave me a chance to look beyond what I had as my vision, which was just becoming a sailor and commanding a ship one day. They helped me look at a bigger picture, not just the Coast Guard but the entire Department of Transportation. Those two men showed me that there’s more out there than just settling for going to sea, that there are special jobs and possibilities I hadn’t even considered.

In the end, a great mentor will honour the mentee’s ideal self and career dream (not the one he’s invested in or the one that mirrors his own career).

Thoughtful sculptors use the tools of patient listening, Socratic questioning, unconditional acceptance, and generous affirmation to help draw forth the dream, name it out loud, and then set about championing mentees’ efforts to get there. via The Best Mentors Think Like Michelangelo

Hope you enjoyed this blog the untold truth about mentors. It is not easy to choose a mentor and invest a lot of money on it.

Start small and gradually lift yourself up.

Join this free seminar with John Assaraf. He is a great mentor and you will love it. Click here to go to the free seminars. 

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10 thoughts on “The Untold Truth About Mentors. What makes a good Mentor and what are the criteria for an outstanding mentor.”

  1. Having a good mentor is definitely a key factor in success! A good mentor can provide guidance, support, and encouragement when you need it most. They can also help you to avoid common mistakes and pitfalls, and offer advice based on their own experiences. Finding a mentor who is knowledgeable, trustworthy, and has your best interests at heart can make all the difference in achieving your goals.

    • Hello
      Yes, having a good mentor is an important step in your developments. You have to choose a person who is already there were you wanna be. It is not good choosing a professor who is teaching in the University. As if you do want to be rich and famous you need to look for someone who is already rich and famous.
      Unfortunately not many people want or can be become a mentor as they do not have the mindset for it.

      Have a great day

    • Hi Alexander
      It is not easy to choose a mentor. You have to consider a couple of points.
      On the other side having a great mentor is necessary to grow. When you have a good Mentor things become easier especially if you start your own business.
      Check out this article the winning game of money

  2. Modelling someone whom has results especially from the field you are a fresher would be the best thing that can happen to you, and if this mentor has time for you, then you are sure to succeed as Napoleon Hill was once under Carnegie and since we learn by osmosis, we saw that Napoleon Hill also became wealthy after learning from Carnegie.
    In our world today, there are so many new fields opening up and people keep trying out new things, making it a challenge to find a mentor in the new field that will show one the path to success. I came across a quote that says, “We don’t lack time and capacity we only lack teachers” and most academic institutions don’t provide us with the needed information in this changing world. So we need more mentors to shape our thoughts and views about life, fulfillment and success.

    • Hello, Jane
      Yes, you are right, and mentors are not easy to find. I had a mentor, and he taught me: Never listen to someone who is not there where you want to be. Take the example University. You are thought by a Person most of the time a Professor in that field. In Business management, the person who teaches you has no practical experience ( most of the time only in theory), but that person will teach you, in theory, all the things you are supposed to know. The only thing is in real life, not everything goes according to the book it changes, and circumstances appear. How to talk about experience and how someone handled them is a big part of being a mentor. For me, a mentor is a person who has achieved that what I want to accomplish in a period. This is also one of the reasons why it is so difficult to find a great mentor with whom you connect.
      Have a wonderful day

  3. I believe a great mentor can make the difference between succeeding and not. Of course there will always be some who can make it alone but on the whole it is always best to have someone to guide you and teach you. I agree that not everyone can be a good mentor.

    Enjoy the journey!

    • Hi Mandy
      Mentoring is a chapter by itself. I am always surprised how many people refuse a mentor because they think a lot of money is involved.
      All though sometimes you find a person who will be your mentor for free. If we look into the subject Mentor to explain it on a base level, you could say a mentor are individuals who give advice and constructive feedback about a variety of different topics depending on your needs. Mentors specialise in their subject or topic. I always had mentors and I will whenever I challenge myself to something new get a new mentor. If you want to achieve something you have to look for the person who has reached it already.
      Have a great day

  4. Dear Sylvia,
    Thank you for your information on mentors.
    Your use of Michelangelo really helped to put it into perspective for me.
    When we search for a mentor we definitely want one who will listen to who we are and what we are about, and what we want to accomplish with our business.
    We also need to be able to listen and be open minded, since our mentor has become a mentor by already having done what we are looking to do.
    Having the right mentor will be big factor in our succeeding. Thank you for giving us the tips on finding a good mentor.

    • Hello, Lee Ann,
      You are welcome. I agree that having a mentor is a great benefit when creating and starting a business.
      Unfortunately, many of us do not believe that we need a mentor. It took me a long time to understand that a mentor will bring me to another level faster. When you pay for a Mentor never see it as an expense see it as an investment in your self.
      Holding on to the money so strong signals that you don’t want to spend it as you do not believe that it will come back to you multiplied. A good Mentor will work on your Mind first to prepare you to be ready for success.
      Read my blog the Manifestation Millionaire


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